allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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