I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
