I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
