I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
