a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
