i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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