Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
A+ Viking dick
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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