ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize