are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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