why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
handjob tips. give me some.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
My day in three words: secret purse cake
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize