He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
