what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
