In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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