I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
