Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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