Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
