Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
