I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
she pinky promised me she was 18
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
