Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
