apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
This baby is an asshole
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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