the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
