You really coming over, don't trick.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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