I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
