He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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