you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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