how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
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