He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Randomize
