Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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