This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
3pm strippers are depressing
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
