dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
