You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
