Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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