This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
