I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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