whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
