How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Randomize