I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
