He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
