it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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