hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize