I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize