please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
