Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You made out with two different species that night
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
