She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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