FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
