you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
