You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
