This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
