i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
