So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
