I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i would one night stand the shit outta him
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
