I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Randomize
